Humorous Stories
I reached down and picked up one of the tomatoes. It was so overripe it was squishy and soft to the touch. My fingers sunk in, almost breaking the skin. I tossed it a few inches up into the air and caught it again. Nice weight. Nice.
Keegan still had his back to me. There was a slight wind—left to right—so I'd have to take that into account. I drew my arm back and threw the tomato. It flew through the air, slightly spiraling, toward him and—splat! It smashed right into the back of his head and exploded into a thousand pieces of pulp!
"Do you want Mrs. Pringle gone forever, her reputation tarnished? She'd never get another job if she's charged with theft. She'll end up with no money, no house, stuffing old newspapers into her boots to keep her feet warm in the winter!" Robyn's voice rose. She sniffed.
I rolled my eyes. "Robyn, get a grip! No one's talking about a crime, here."
"How did you know? Maybe someone took that book and tried to sell it," Robyn retorted.
"And how would a person sell something like that, Robyn? A garage sale?" I shook my head.
"Photocopier malfunctions are not newsworthy," Martin said. "Not newsworthy?" Trixi said. "Listen to me, Marty. This week at our school, you had the best stories any newspaper editor could hope for. Just think of the headlines you could have had! Photocopier Goes Wild! This Week Origami! Next Week, Paper Airplanes?"
"That’s ridiculous," Martin said.
"Or how about Toilets Reciting Poetry at Upland Green School! What Will They Do Next? Sing Opera? Tap Dance?" "That's even more ridiculous. In my newspaper, I just report the facts," Martin said.
